Chapter 8 Excerpt

Grub and Other Delicacies

Perhaps the most important chapter, since you have to eat there no matter how short your stay!   Ignoring all snide comments about British "cuisine", I will guide you through the differences not only in the food that's available (or not), but also how and when the Brits eat.   Graduates of this chapter will experience less panic when faced with a pub menu featuring Ploughmans' Lunch, Bangers and Mash, or even Toad in the Hole.

"Tea - so what is this tea business anyway?   As I mentioned, in some parts of the country an early evening meal is called "tea", so if you're invited to tea, it could be a fairly full meal, or tiny sandwiches, creamy cakes and posh cups of tea.   If you are invited to the posh version, don't panic!  

"Apart from learning how to place a china cup in its saucer without shattering it, there's really nothing to it.   Your host will basically wheel out the goodies and the tea, and bob's your uncle!   As with any meal, leave the sweet stuff till last.   If you insist on hosting a tea yourself, there are tons of "how to" type books and magazines to help.   The main thing to remember is that it's not supposed to be a torture session for you or your guests."